Damn, where did 2009 go?

It's as if it came and just bounced without even saying goodbye. 2009 was a solid year; nothing different, yet inferior to 2008. Money continued to be the main issue in our household, but it's getting better. Hopefully everyone else's stress is being alleviated. This year appeared to be the pothole in the road with all the dilemmas and surprises we had. I won't get into detail about them, but... WeSC, C.D., wax, benign, Honda, Levis, CD's, to name a few. There were some awesome highlights however. Breakfast haha, draaanks, artworks, cousin bonding, volleyball always, new good friends and losing none, FAFSA money haha, coaching, etc.

Last year, I had a lot of "resolutions" that I barely kept throughout the year, but they helped remind me of the healthier and ideal person I want to be. So I think I'll just continue with those.

-drink more water
-don't procrastinate as much
-be more active
-exercise!!
-read more books!
-go out instead of staying home on the lapppy haha
-check out local events to keep busy
-homework as early as possible
-meet more people
-create stronger bonds with friends
-turn friends into good friends
-get a job
-be nicer to mom and dad haha

I'm not really into blogging right now, but I just felt like I had to put something before the year ends. Maybe I'll update this later. Just maybe.

with a new year in only 23 minutes,
Ricardo Juni

I love how my break has become more eventful towards the end.

But to be honest, I don't care, haha. I really needed this break to literally do nothing/whatever. Call me a bratty little white girl, but it was necessary for this break to be all about me. I took myself shopping half the time, slept in and stayed up as much as I wanted, went out when I pleased, etc. I'm not completely satisfied, but I will soon feel refreshed and ready to handle 2010. This break was my detox; withdrawals are in my immediate future.

Though I only have five more days of freedom, they will be jam-packed with much activity. Sushi, volleyball, the New Year, beer pong, King's cup, alchy hehe, chillin' with friends, eating, y todos tambien.

with organized wrecklessness at its best,
Ricardo Juni

God who?

Today, we found out that dad has a tumor above his kidney, but as weird and awkward as it sounds, we all went on with our day as if nothing happened. Don't get me wrong, that put a complete damper on my break and Christmas spirit, but it just seems like it is life's way of letting us know how much time we really have together. I didn't even find myself on my knees, hands together, and whispering prayers to you because you can't and won't help us.

I don't think I will ever consider myself a Catholic. However, I'm fine with the label just so that I don't offend anyone and trigger any unpleasant debates. But I honestly believe that you were never there for me, unlike my parents. You were never there to alleviate harsh situations, unlike my parents and friends. I tried waiting for you, but it felt like you left me in the cold when shit went sour. I can't put my trust and "faith" in someone/something that hasn't done a good deed for me and my family. Maybe it's because I don't go to church and uphold my Catholic duties, but there's no point. Your guidance is unnecessary when we can all just experience and learn from ourselves and each other. I can learn to love thyself on my own, thanks.

Why do we constantly beg for your mercy, when all we get in return is more pain and worry. And when something good actually happens, we thank you. No, we should thank reality and ourselves for surviving.

I am my own god. I'd rather put trust and faith in myself since I control everything about me.

Ricardo Juni

PS. There are only millions of people who get fucked up and hammered in your name. Ooops.

UUUHHHH SON

I'm Finally on Winter Break and it feels damn good.

In the past week, I barely had any sleep. In fact, I think I had only 17 hours, minus the 3 hour naps. I studied and did all I could, and feel I did sufficient work. Not the best, but definitely above average. So far, I have an A in design class! Mrs. Briggs loves me haha. I'm positive that I'm going to get an A in oil painting, and possibly a B+/A- in art history. I don't even want to talk about my physics grade. eeeeeeeek!

My sleeping pattern is soooo jacked! Even though I pulled two all-nighters last week, and still feeling the repercussions. I've been going to sleep at 6am and waking up at 3:30p! UGH. It's sooo bad for me :[ But it's painful to wake up haha. I try so hard to get up, but it's a constant war between my mind and my body. They need to marry each other and soon!

On the brighter side, Christmas is in less than two weeks :] Christmas shopping has ended up being ME-mas shopping lately though haha. Seriously, since I got my PAYCHECK last Thursday, I've bought a pair of J's, some satin Vans, a military-esque coat, a cardigan, food haha, and yarn for crocheting. I've also had to help pay for some of the house expenses, but it's all goooooood.

I can't wait for what break will have in store. Bowling, bbqs, more shopping!, volleyball, foood!, New Year's :], parties, beer pong and flip cup, y todos!

Let the fuckin' fun times lift us off our feet.

Real Time

I didn't give up, but I don't feel like a survivor either. I finished my UC applications, even suffering a baby anxiety attack and breakdown. I applied to UC Berkeley, UCLA, Irvine, Santa Cruz, and Davis. I got through the storm, but I honestly don't think my feet will get off the ground until later in my life. I swear, I've stayed the same kid between high school and this very instance.

So if I get accepted to all the schools I apply to, I would go to Berkeley, even after more than a year of hyping UCLA. I'll be closer to home without being too close and still experience life after San Jose. Though the bums will creep me out xforever, the atmosphere is inspiring and beautiful; perfect for an art student. UCLA will defintely be my second choice. UCLA is just in a dopeass place for any person to grow. The city will put people in check and help place them in reality, even being the city where dreams come true. And there's a shitload to do during the off-time. Since both schools have strong art programs, I'll win both ways. Let's just not consider the rejection from both schools.

The work might seem to lose its magnitude, but there's still hella shit to get done. I'm glad, however, that one of the hardest parts is over. I still have my finals, final art projects, and tons of studying to do, but I feel more confident about them. After fall quarter is over, I have to start on my supplementary application for UCLA which includes ANOTHER statement and a portfolio of between 6-10 images. It's due in about a month, but how come I feel like I'm going to procrastinate again? Another test of my character will be upon me sooner than I think.

I'm so looking forward to this break. I get to see my homies, bowl more, chill more, basically _____ more.

ANDDDD I get my volleyball check hollla! Buying presents will actually be a pleasasnt experience. I can finally get my parents, my sister, and Scott something without worrying much. I want to get a tree too, but it won't have any presents under it haha. We should just have a Christmas table!

God, let me survive this next week, this next break, this next month and I will truly be happy and grateful.



with success in my thoughts,
Ricardo Juni

"I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me"

I don't really want to have two consecutive melo-dramatic blogs, but I can't deny my shitty situations.

I feel like I've lost, again. I can say I tried, but not enough. Fuck. After two years, I thought I would be in a more mature and responsible stage in my life, but I'm still the little lazyass 17 year-old who couldn't write two coherent personal statements. The UC system - 2, me - 0.

These statements aren't even hard. It's just difficult to writeabout myself in about 500 words. I tend to lose focus and lack concision.

If I don't make the cut, then I'll have to wait another year and apply as a senior transfer. I don't want that at all. I don't want to be stuck at my parents' house for another year. I don't want to continue sleeping in the living room and listening to my parents bitch about our financial dilemmas. I want to finally get out of here and explore. Have experiences you only get by venturing out and actually living on your own. Oh, and I don't want to be asked to coach again haha.

It looks like I'm going to break people's expectations once again. It's already written in the volleyball program that I'm suppose to be transferring to UCLA in the Fall of 2010. I've already told so many people that I'm planning on transferring next year. What if I don't make the deadline? What am I going to tell people? That I was too fuckin' lazy and procrastinated, AGAIN?! The likelihood is crashing in that direction.

I really do need to hold someone's hand right now. I'm scared of defeat.

What happened?

Where has sincerity gone?
Enough with whackass people.
Enough with shady people.
Enough with rude people.
Enough with inconsiderate people.
It seems like only a few hold it down these days.
I know as hell I hold it down for my people.
But they won't reciprocate.

I'm getting real tired of some people.
I broke down infront of my JV team.
I want to make new friends.
I want to hang out with downass people with pure motives.
I don't want to worry anymore.

School is cool. My art classes are fun. Art history is pretty interesting. Physics seems like a blur. Rough start, but smooth lately. Feeling good.

Can we all just be down for our people? It's not much to ask.


Ricardo Juni

Volleyball and Berkeley Getdown

Fuck, I haven't submitted anything in about a month. Allow me to get comfy because this will be a little lengthy.

To be honest, I thought this summer would be more eventful. Instead, it has been quite chill. I still have about three weeks before I go back to school, but I'm enslaved to volleyball practice everyday Monday through Friday from 3 to 6. This means I can't go to the beach, or San Francisco, or any other all-day activities during the week. OH WEYLLL, at least I'm makin' the paypa thanks!

Volleyball has been going pretty well. Far better than last year already! I only have one returning player, as oppose to last year's four, but almost every girl on the team played in middle school. The team this year has so much potential and is improving everyday. I have a feeling we're going to be in the top 3 this year, just a prediction :] In fact, Tina told me that our team "better take first this year!" Coming from a college player and former MP JV coach, that meant a lot to me.

I went to Berkeley with Jacky and Jessica this past weekend, and shit, it has been one of the highlights of this summer! We walked around Telegraph, the main street near UC Berkeley, and shopped. We then met up with Kathleen and ate at Thai House, which is suppose to really popular among college students. It was fuckin' delicious! Enough said. After I almost died from food coma, we went back to Jessica's dorm to chill and get ready for the frat party we were suppose to go to. Then we went to get Jessica's friend, Jason, and did a alcohol run at the nearby Lucky's. Damn, you can tell Jessica and Jason have done this many a times before. After, we went to Fabian's apartment, drank up, and got buzzed enough to get Jessica drunk! haha that bitch! Jessica's bitchass was getting antsy and was wanting so bad to get going. But some of us wasn't feeling the Lady-Gaga-themed party since there was alleged rank of who can go in first. So we just went to another party at CZ, aka Casa Zimbabwe wtf. But fuck, it was crackin' more than chapped lips! We got into the "VIP" area and got some nastyass beer. We met the head diva coke whore, Marissa, who surprisingly had white girl nappy hair! She was a little too Courtney Love for my taste, so I had to pass. But anyway, we went on the floor and did our damn thaang! It was sooo fun. Everyone was getting down like nothing was wrong. I loved it! There was also a stripper pole for the drunk shameless to entertain the crowd, and I have to say, they didn't disappoint. They were grinding and sliding and clapping all over the stage. They took it to the next level and went Vanessa Hudgens on us minus the beavers. It was all in good fun. (Note to self: Check YouTube everytime I want to relive Saturday since everyone had their cameras out). The party was crackin' until around 1am. We were trying to look for Jessica and right in the middle of the all the mayhem, some chick went up to me and asked if I was Filipino. Thinking "what the fuck," I politely replied with a yes. Xochitl then told me that her friend was Filipina and thought that she was the only one of the Philippine persuasion. I was like "cool" and went along using my conversation skills to find out more about them in hopes of adding another friend to my count of Facebook buddies. Xochitl, Jan, and Eduardo. After, Jacky, Kathleen, and I went outside and waited for the Three Single Ladies. Only Jessica came out and we walked back to the parking lot where Jessica's car was, which was 3 blocks and across the UC campus away. We drove to Kathleen's apartment, and made ourselves at home. She made some yummyass noodles with Spam and I ate it all even after listening to moans and groans and orgasm a couple of doors down. SOOO GROSS. We went to sleep, woke up the next morning, and left for SJ.

I'm still in search for more spontaneity in the next few weeks before I go back to Hell.


with much anticipation,
Ricardo Juni

Highlights and August Arrival

So I decided not to record every single day of my summer anymore for the sole purpose that most of the time I'm doing the same thaang - chi chi chillin'.

Since the last blog, I've been uhh chillin', playing volleyball, and going to different types of performances.

Volleyball has actually taken up more time away from spending time with my friends. But in all honesty, I kind of like it. Don't get me wrong, I love all my friends, but I need some time away to do my own thing. Volleyball has helped me do that and connect with people I don't usually see often. I've been playing volleyball three to four times a week! I still feel fat haha, but sweating feels soo good!

This weekend, I saw Jo Koy at SJ Improv and hot damn! He is hilarious! Manong is one of the funniest people I've ever seen. Some guy named Ty opened for him. He was pretty funny, but you could definitely tell he was still at an amateur level. Jo Koy on the otherhand, recited like a pro. Shit, after 15 years in the business, that nigga better had! He covered topics about earthquakes, girls/guys night outs, his son, and also performed topics that made him famous! Our seats were great but the food portion was fuckin' tiny! And the hurricane glass was overpriced! I didn't mind since Jo Koy signed it! yee yeee! AND I took a picture with him. Thursday was a good night.

Then Saturday, I went to Shoreline with Jessica to see The Fray for the second time. And let me say, they never disappoint. Isaac Slade's voice was a little weak in the beginning though, but what do you expect from him after performing 3 shows prior within a 4-day span. After a while, his voice returned to its soulful, baritone voice and I was a happy camper. Not to mention our seats were fabulous! The show went by too fast :[ even though they went through all the songs on their self-titled sophomore album, half of "How To Save A Life," and their rendition of Kanye's "Heartless." I was singing the whole time! And yelling everytime I came in touch with Fray euphoria. We also were talking to this girl who kind of reminded us of a younger Mrs. Yamashita! haha. She kept asking us what each song was called but I didn't mind since I knew all of them hehe :] Too bad we didn't pick up her name or anything. I guess she will forever be known to us as Lil' Yam haha.

I'd say this year's tour was just a bit better than 2007's. The lights were amazing! During one of the songs, a huge parrot slowly made its way across the screen. You couldn't really tell that it was actually a parrot since it was close up. But after a while, it hit me. That's definitely more aesthetically pleasing than 2007's where there was footage of a longass roadtrip full of green hills and fuckin' cows! haha. I do feel that they became less intimate with the audience even though they told the crowd that it was Ben's 4th wedding anniversary and dedicated a song to her. But whatever, they were so goood and flawless that I'm starting to just pick at the little trivial things!

Anyway, it's August! That means volleyball conditioning and back to school for most us. But not me fuckers! HA! I still got two months before I go back to Hell.

C'mon August, bring spontaneity and verbs.


with more highlights to come,
Ricardo Juni

No more "I," please.

Lately, I've been realizing that many people boast about themselves maybe a little too much. They say this and that about themselves and truly believe they are what they say they are. "I rock _____" or "I'm really good at ____," or other self-proclaiming statements built on insecurity and needs of attention. Stop complimenting yourself and give to others because if you were truly who you say you are, it would be so obvious and self-evident that people will be able to notice without any hints or directness. Modesty is a virtue, but so many lose its grasp. Trade in the ego for self-pity; people will find you more classy and charming if you just poke at your flaws and laugh about them. "ME, ME, ME" is a no-no.

Modesty lost.



with grave concern,
Ricardo Juni

Days 14 - 18

Thursday 7/9: Beyonce! One word: Unbelievable. She seriously is the greatest female entertainer alive. "I am Yours." Beautiful. She played almost every song on her latest album and I swear, they sounded just like the recording. Her outfits were crazy and perfect for the stage, except for the tacky white Ice Queen get up during Ave Maria. The Arco Arena itself is SMALLL! I think SJSU's event center is bigger. It looks like the Kings can barely play horse on that half-court amount of space. The fuuuck! But yeah, the concert will probably be one of my fondest memories EVER!

Friday 7/10: Me and bitches watched Bruno in the morning. It was only $6! The movie was funny, but not piss-my-Soen-panties funnny. It was out of control and had more than enough shock value. Sacha Baron Cohen must have steel balls to throw this movie into the global spotlight. But everything in it is valid. It's sad though because the movie made The South look like the shithole it actually is. Oh well. it just takes me back to a saying I've heard before: "Foreigners hate Americans but love Californians."
Then we ate at East Lake and had lunch fo' only $5.50! I had my hood off and didn't notice how busted my weave looked until I got into my car and looked into my rearview mirror! I'm in serious need of a hurrrcute PRONTO!
I napped and got ready for Popie's birthday luau. Jacky came over and we waited for Rosemary and Josh. When they FINALLY came, we were off to the party. I must say, the party was actually crackin' and 100 times better than last year. It might've been because I had a few shots but nonetheless, I had to great time just chit-chattin' with some old faces and making new memories. Then we went to Jacky's, made crepes haha, and played Scattegories.

Saturday 7/11: Free Slurpies! But I didn't get any :[ Rosemary came over and we waited for bitchass Jacky to wake up from her nap. When she did so, we bounced over and tried to figure out where to eat. PHU LAM! There was a wedding going on so it was hard to converse. We had Chow Fun and Stir Fried Beef and Tofu. It all filled us up and only cost us $22! Jelly? haha. Then we went to Mish's for a little bbq during the UFC fight. I don't care about UFC. I only care about TFC haha. Then I went home (pretty early 12a) and chilled at home the rest of the night.

Sunday 7/12: Nigga Steffani called me up and asked if I wanted to go on a roadtrip. I said "sure" and next thing I knew, we were off to Napa to drop off her bestfriend, Michael. On the way, we stopped in Vallejo for some pho haha at Pho #1. Then we went over to Michael's "Grandpa's" house in the hills. It was HUGE! Three stories and two outside decks that overlooked the Nappy Hills haha. Amazing. Then we drove by PUC and dropped off Michael. On the way back, Steff and I caught up about current affairs and gossiped and made a list of things to do before summer ends. The drive was sooooo scenic. There were sooo lush green grape vines, all symmetrical and mirroring of each other. And to think, each vineyard actually competes with each other. Vallejo was another story. It looked like a ghost town, with so many empty spaces filled with dead shrubs and wiped out parking lots. It was a sight full of gloom and despair. I will never move to Vallejo, Thank You.
Then I got home and washed Benny. I chilled the rest of the time at home.

Monday 7/13: I played vball with the MP girls at Silver Creek. A tad boring and SUPER hawt! I came home and talked with Anthony about a bonfire at daNIEL's house. We called up the "gang" haha and made it happen. We made smores in Daniel's backyard, chopped it up, and played the movie game. Yeah, that was pretty much it. Very chill and very filling.


Summer is beautiful.


With happiness,
Ricardo Juni

Days 11 - 13

Monday 7/6: Me, Josh, and Adrian exercised at Daniel's. I actually fuckin' ran all the way from my house to his without stopping. Weeeellll I had to stop at the light hehe. Then we ate some Taco Bell and Lee's Sandwiches. Chilled with Anthony and Mish then went to Lucky's, Longs, Safeway, and Save Mart just to look for RED VELVET CAKE MIX DAMN! Super Market Sweep old skoool! Then I chilled at home, looked for a phone, and watched tv until around 9 then me, Anthony, and Daniel went to Mish's to bake cupcakes! :] Kathleen, Kimberly, and Joann came over too and we just chit chatted, did a crossword puzzle, and ate the cupcakes holla! We couldn't finish them so we fuckin' duhhhhhrove (well actually I drove) around to people's houses to personally hand them cupcakes from the heart awwwww! We asked each person to decide which person we should drop off a cupcake to next. We made it a game as we went. PICTURES ON FACEBOOK.

Tuesday 7/7: I was going to go to open gym but I didn't have anyone to go with hmm so I just stayed at home and went to Manang Michelle's apartment to pick up the camera, eat her adobo, and take spaghetti home haha. Then Rosemary, Josh, and Andre met at my house and we went bowling with HELLLA HEADS. So many that it took three lanes! It was fun as hell! We all just laughed and had a good time. Then we picked up Kathleen's mom's pineapple fried rice OMG! and Scattegories and Jenga! We chilled in my garage until almost 5 in the morning just playing games! What could be better right?!

Wednesday 7/8: Me, Anthony, Adrian, and Josh exercised again at Daniel's house. Then I went to MP's open gym. It was ALRIGHT. Kinda boring and errrbody was rusty as fuck. I dropped off hos and went home and woke that bitch SCOTT so I could get my Sidekick LX! YEE YEE. It was only $100! I still needed a SIM card and memory card but s'all good. Daddy bought it :] Then I went to open gym at Independence with Gladys, Gurpreet, Chris, Holland, and Lisey, but it was lacking in liveliness. I hate paying money to play shitty volleyball. We won all our games, but I still sweated YOU KNOW ME SHIT. We tried to make the best of it though by just fuckin' around when we could and made nicknames for each other. We found Lisey sister! and I swear there was some sibling rivalry hahaha. You had to be there!! Then we had a victory "dinner" at fuckin' Wendy's haha and just talked and cracked jokes about picking our noses haha. I dropped the little Asians off and went home to find my phone fully working! I was sooooo fuckin' happpy! I can't take it out of my sight, shit!

Tomorrow: BEYONCE!!! Enough said.


With smiles,
Ricardo Juni

Days 8 - 10

What a weekend!

Thursday was really just a kickback day. We got stuff for Friday's party and planned more things.

Friday was the day! I'm not going to cover every measely detail about the night because we are going to talk about it for weeks to come. I'll let the homies remind me of everything that night.

But...

Getting "fucked" up, Jacky getting real fucked up, beer pong, I LOST MY PHONE :[, best friends anyone could have, EARACHE :[, H2O shots, ghetto kids, Tina's friends, dramatic grey-shirt man, EMT dude, overheating, "move bitches!," "this girl ain't poppin'," Dani's funnyass, Mary Berry and Andrew, beer that looked like soda/energy drink the fuck?, blue-turning mountains, brown grandpa sweater, "I hate thissss, Why did you guys let me drink that muchhhh?," "I want to lay down.. right here," bathroom yack, toe dots haha, etc.

Saturday was Fourth of July. It was cool. Not great, not fantastic, but just cool. Me and Anthony went to Jacky's to find her still hungover! We just chilled and I made more delicious garlic bread. Mish came over and we planned the rest of the night. We decided Canyon Creek park. We went back to my house and waited for fellow bitches to come. Andre took the longest, ringing in at 9pm! Jesus. We sped on the fastlane to the park thinking hellla people would be there. But umm, it was only a group of DoMai's, a handful of families, and Rocky +bitches. Haha. We even brought along lawn chairs to sit on the grass but the sprinklers were on! So we just sat on the tanbark and watched the works. It was beautiful. There were 6 to 7 going off simultaneously in different parts of East Side. It looked like it was planned and shit. Most of the people left but an Asian family came and lit their own fireworks. It was actually pretty sick. They were hella fobs though talking like Mistah Chow from The Hangover. Not cute. We got hungry after a while since Rosemary's cold cut fries and single bite of Spam Wasubi didn't quite hit the spot. We got pho holla! I actually got fuckin' full and only fo' $6.75 :] While we were eating, the Vietnamese channel was on and I gotta say it DOES NOT beat TFC, my pride and joy. Then we headed back to Rosemary's for intense ping pong play and ridiculous poker and blackjack. "This card is aaaaaaaaaaa... DONKEY!?" hahaha. Then all of a sudden bitches were practicing their BP skills like there was going to be a tournament the next day or something. All I wanted to do was to play a nice game of PING pong but NO. Some niggas seem to be becoming alcoholics, JUST SAYIN.' But I ended joining in. We all tried to shooot into a tall plastic cup, but most of us failed except for Jacky, who took only liiike 15 attempts, I swear. The rest of us spent well over an hour. Andre was the last. Back to Anthony's house for bread and a good chill session until it was ended by Jacky's bitchassness and sleep deprivation.

Today: Park 'n chill. See you on the East Side!

**Update: Mish, Anthony, and me went to find a new park to make our own. Our efforts were noble, but failed anyway. We settled for Fowler and chit chatted. My ass got hellllza hungry so we drove to L&L after 20 minutes of talking about possibilities: Wingstop, Lucky's, Cluck's, etc. L&L was closed though so we went to Sam Kee. What a fuckin' goood choice! I love that place! We ordered WALNUT SHRIMP (you already know!), Schezuan chicken, and Peking spare ribs YUM! Oh goodness me. We had a really good conversation about some bitches and religion and everythaaaaang in between. Then we went back to our houses and just chilled and thought about what to do next. DING: Rosemary's house for pingpong again haha. Daniel and Kathleen came too. We played poker (I was king!), ping pong, and ate the left overs. Then Mish took all of us home haha. BOOOOM DONE.

Tomorrow: jog, P90X, biking, and possibly some open gym volleyball!

A more retrospective and insightful blog will come soon!



with much ch ch ch chillin',
Ricardo Juni

Days 4 - 7

So I haven't blogged about the past few days because I pretty much didn't do shit! hehe But this weekend is going to be lively and fuckin' kuhhrazzy!

Sunday 6/28 & Monday 6/29: I stayed home! Read, shit, tv, ate, the usual mah nigz.

Tuesday 6/30: Open gym at EVHS. A little whack because almost everyone there was a JV player. I hella sweated still though haha, but I shouldn't have put 50 pounds of deoderant under each armpit! What a waste! I finally saw Sandy Tss Tss Vu after thousands of years and shit! I missed that bitch. Whassup, I'm Bruno! haha. So we gave each other nicknames and mine was PANDA OF COURSE! Sandy was fuckin' Goku's daughter or some shit. Holland was Prince Zuko from Avatar. Chris was Mushu, the tinyass dragon from Mulan haha. And Van was Hiro from Heroes. And our team name was Team Vietnam/ Pho Noodles/ Sriracha/ Rooster hahaha. Then Sandy and me went to 7-11 after and got some slurpees. But the machines were gay and not working PLUS the area was dirtier than a month's worth of my doodooo butter ;] So I just ended up getting an Arizona. Then I had to go to Long's to get some ear wax removal aid for my clogged up ear. I saw Andre, Alexis, and her mom there haha. What a coincidence! And they helped me out THANKS! But yeah, I hate it when my ear gets clogged up with ear wax. It's a bitch because it's always followed by an extended earache :[[[[ And I'm running out of Tylenol!!! fuck. But anyway, I headed back to my house and saw daNIEL and Anthony chillin' outside so I joined. We chilled and talked about FRIDAY! haha. Adrian and Ness came over and I drove us to Canyon Creek to look at a possible chill spot for 4th of July. Wendy's was next on our adventure, and bitchass Bui and one of his men were there. That nigga ghost-rid Benny like She was some jacked up Buick or something. NIGGA PLEASE! Thank God he skipped away from us. We went back to my house and chilled s'more!

Wednesday 7/1: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MANANG MICHELLE! Too bad we didn't do anything for her birthday :[ All I did today was sit on my fatass. I was going to open gym and Lez's sister was tooo scared to stay home alone. Pshh. And she's 20 years-old!!!

I'm watching the Real World: Cancun and it's a crazyass season already! And hellla funnny! Most of the girls are bitches. The black girl seems like a pseudo-ghettoass hoodstar. The latina is a bitch straight up with a nastyass gap bigger than the store. The white girl reminds me of Kimberly from the Real World: Hollywood, except for having dark brown hair. The half sistah is pretty with her fabulous blue eyes, but her weave is sooo scene, JAYSUS! She's hella cool though; I like her hehe. The guys are hella more chill. Bronne is sooo fuckin' funnny! CJ is too much a homewrecker. The gay one is like the anchor that holds the house down. And Joey is a cool white rocker dude. I'm hella on his side! I felt bad that his $1,000 guitar got fucked up. And that's one of the only things he has :[ He said he only has clothes and his two guitars; that's all his stuff. *tears. But anyway, this season might be even better than last season! And last season was my favorite! OOOHHH WEEEEE.

Hopefully, I chill with the bitches tomorrow. Party on Friday whasssup! Fourth of July on Saturday!

Ahhh, life is really good right now.

with much bliss and happiness,
Ricardo Juni

DAY 3

It's true. You have disappointed me.

Why are you doing this to yourself? I thought you were bigger than this. When I saw you laying on the front porch, I knew you've given in. You've devalued yourself with lame excuses for your actions. Yeah, you were drunk, but that doesn't quite cut it. I used to exponentially look up to you as more than a best friend but as a sister who has come a long way. You've gone through so much shit, but you didn't let it phase you with grace and now you go to one of the best schools in the world. But now you're tearing at the seams and your insides are crumbling. I don't want to see you like this but I unfortunately have. Yeah, you definitely fucked up big time but bounce back! You deserve better, and you eventually will. You need to stop being okay with mediocre and crave for near perfection. I know it's easier said than done but the best always succeed. YOU are my best friend.


With unconditional love,
Ricardo Juni


ps. HELLLA HAWT. Manang Michelle's dinner at Kim Tar BBQ Restaurant. HENN with Anthony, Rosemary, and Jacky. Martika's for like 5 seconds. Back at my house and chilled.

DAY 2

Today, 6/26, was fabulous!

I woke up and went to De Anza to sell some books and pick up my art portfolio. I left with $40 in mahhh wallet and an A in my Art4A class :] I could already tell it was going to be a good day. I chilled at home and organized the bbq for later on. I napped for a bit and woke up realizing that it was almost 6. Jacky and Mish took FOREVER to get to my house, but once they got here, we were off to pick up and Santi and get the supplies. We got a shitload of chicken, salsa ingredients, soda, and tortillas holllla! It was sooo funny seeing us 5 Filipinos kids pushing a cart at SU VIANDA, fuck. Then we went to Rite Aid to get the draaanks and had sooo much trouble in doing so. It said 4 Pepsis for $5 but I swear that shit didn't register in my head. I was getting Fanta and Squirt and Sierra Mist and all this shit. What a trip! We headed back to Santi's and got the kickback started! Bitches gradually came. We played video games (ugh), waited porebber for the chicken to grill, and just KICKED BACK YA KNOW! Random bitches came and left thanks be to God upstairs. Beer pong 'til the AM was funnny. Jacky just gave up on my ass and bitched out just like the slutty ho she is. Anthony was as pink as a sliced watermelon. I was dancing but nobody noticed :[ Everyone else was chill. But you know it ain't a party unless I'm there hehe. My record as of rightt now is 0-2 ;[ We boogied on out at around 3:45a.

Tomorrow: My sister's birthday dinner + draaanks at my house after + TRIPLE DIGIT HEAT.

Oh fuck, here we go!


with much gas,
Ricardo Juni

First Blog of Summmmmaaa!

Whassup Whassup! I'm finally on summer break and I feel like a new person. I feel more like an independent black woman. Or maybe not. But I PEEL PREE PASHO! haha. My finals were out of control unsexy and I'm sooooo glad that it's all over. I think I'm going to end up with 2 As, 1 B, and 1 C; therefore, my GPA will be about the same! Oh to tha muhhhfuckin' well mang!

But damn, my Freshman year of college is actually over. I know I dreaded class almost everyday, but when I look back, it went by faster than one of my farts. How sweet! It seemed like my fifth year of high school, but with tougher teachers and actual white students in my classes! haha. I met some cool people, definitely stressed fireballs, chilled, and had amazing professors to be perfectly honest. I slacked off sometimes, but my study habits have improved without a doubt! I still have a problem procrastinating and organizing my time, but compared to how I was my Senior year of high school, it's like I'm a perfect student. Overall, I enjoyed my first year.

Anyway, I'm going to try and post a new blog everyday just for the hell of it. I wanna look back when I'm bored and have a good read.

SO TODAY 6/25: I took my last final which was for Anthro1. It was pretty hard since I barely studied for it. But what can you do. I went with EJ to sell his books so I can know how much my books would cost. Then I went home and literally just moped around with freedom. It felt sooooo goood. I took Scott to Circle-A to find that someone bought the last backpack that he wanted. WHAT A WASTE OF GAS. OH! And scary ghetto brothah hoodlums asked me and Scott for money so they could buy their bitchasses a McChicken. I told them that I didn't have change hehe. I fuckin' bet they had money, but just too cheap to buy it themselves. We went home and found out that the legend, the King, the Man (in the Mirror), Michael Jackson and 70's vixen and original Angel, Farrah Fawcett, passed away :[[[[[[ That hella put a damper on my day :[[ and MJJ was only 50 years YOUNG. Fuck. I'm glad that Ms. Farrah could finally rest in tranquility. God Bless them. I chilled at home and napped until 9:30p. Adrian called to come over Anthony's. So I did haha. Hookahed like usual. Jacky and Mish came over and we went to Adrian's house. I got my ass handed to me on UFC, no bitches, not TFC haha. Did our thang ;] and chilled at my house until around 4. Now, I'm here recording all this shieetttt. What a fabulous start to my break :]

And for the record, Michael Joe Jackson DID NOT molest any money-hungry children. I honestly believe, with all my heart, that MJ squared is a noble and honest man. He reminds me of Holden from The Catcher in the Rye because I believe that MJ found children to be the only innocent human beings on Earth. It all goes back to why he named his backyard "Neverland Ranch." The reference to never growing up and staying in the likes of children reveal internal struggles he has had growing up as a child star. And the whole thing about little boys and shit: since he suffered through a harsh childhood full of abuse, fame, and everything else a kid usually doesn't go through, he finds comfort in having a safe place for boys (and girls). He just wants to make an attempt in saving the children from inevitable corruption they will face by adults. He may be a little eccentric, but aren't the most memorable people in all of history just that? A little beyond the norm? So whatever to the haters, Mike! I may sound naive, but he appears to be really genuine. I can't stand all the shit thrown at him without him speaking on his behalf.

HOWEVER, the two things he's definitely not saying the truth about are his skin and surgeries. And there goes my tuppence worth. Thank you.

On a brighter note: Chillin' and evening BBQ in the hood tomorrow!



With much flava and a new mindset,
Ricardo Juni

Roughly 4 1/2 hours of my first year of college left! Fuck, finally! But I still have an infinite amount of homework and studying to accomplish. While everyone's galavanting galavanting and enjoying a relatively cool start to summer, I'm still slaving over Finals. But since I AM the party and shit, their summer hasn't started yet either haha! So heyyyy! Just think, in exactly a week, I'll have almost no stress over ANYTHING. And I'll be at the BEACH, BITCHNIGGGAZ! Finals week will be my darkest hour.

I decided to drop my summer classes because I honestly feel that I would not be able to put all my focus and concentration into them. I even told my EWRT2 professor that. See, I was gonna take his summer EWRT1B class at 7:30a! He asked me after class if I was still taking it and I told him," yeah I don't think I could fully commit to it so why bother." He just laughed and I said tooodles! haha. I would need to pass EWRT1B and Physics 50 with at least Bs, but with summer activities overflowing in my calenday already, it seems a tad ideal. It'll be hard next year though to juggle everything, having to coach volleyball and actually get into limited classes due to budget cuts.

The Fall 09 course catalogue came out and I'm planning my classes already! So far, I'm thinking of taking an EWRT1B online class, Physics 50, ARTS8, and some GE class. I just realized every quarter is going to get harder and harder. There goes my GPA yikes!

what else hmmmm. I guess you guys can tell I've had school on my brains for the past few weeks. I'm just sooo scared of failing and redoing my whole high school career. Community college is like a second chance for me so I can't blow it this time around.

Oh and.....



BEYONCE JULY 9 IN SACTOWN YOU ALREADY KNOW!


With great energy,
Ricardo Juni

SHAZAAAAAMM!!

Sooo.

I technically have two more weeks of Spring quarter, but actually only 4 days of instruction left before 3 days of finals. Not bad at all. All is going well I guess, I'm just worried about my grade in Physical Anthropology. I IZZ SKURRED!

What else. Oh, I'm still debating on whether I should take summer session. I registered for two classes - EWRT 1B at 7:30a! and Physics 50 at 10a! That english class might be way too early for me so I might just drop it and keep that physics class. Yeah, I think I'll do that. I can relatively sleep in and get out before noon. The whole day will still be ahead of me, but it'll be hard to simultaneously focus on school and on each bright, sunny Californian day hehe. But Summer won't officially start until August 8th! By then, I would've have gone to the beach three million times and gone to the I AM Beyonce Tour and Fray Concert! HIP HIP!

Lately, I've been contemplating on where to transfer and whether I should change my major. I was thinking of changing it to Fine Arts, but I would just let everyone, including myself, down. I can't constantly go through life the "easy" way out. I gotta challenge myself; the harder the obstacle, the sweeter the outcome. Therefore, I'm considering Fine Arts as my minor yee! And SCHOOLS. Besides UCLA, I'm thinking of UC Berkeley and University of Southern California, both for architecture. This whole time, I thought LA had the actual architecture program, pero it only has architecture STUDIES wtf? But anyway, these may seem like big dreams. And fuck, maybe they are, but this is part of my life-long challenge. I've been strategizing and so far, this is what I got: At least get Bs in my GE courses, but ACEEEEE physics, calculus, and all the art courses I have to take. It's POSSIBLE! AND everytime I work on an art project, I have to put everything I got because it could be a possible piece in my portfolio. WHOOOP THERE IT ISSS!

Ummmm. I think that's it.
*2 As, 2 Bs.
*Physics 50 preps me for Physics 2A. Ace that mothafucka! And drop EWRT 1B. Tooo fuckin' early please!
*Talk to a counselor about class scheduling for next year, and transfering! Eeeeekness nigga!

With big dreams,
Ricardo Juni

Losing my way

God, help me.

So many people have already finished school and I want to be one of them. But that cannot happen for I still have 5 weeks of Hell left. I'm starting to gradually lose focus and concentration after each week. I'm drained, and I don't think I can find anymore inspiration to fill the void. I remember seeing Andre's quote, "Forever Stay Focused," and I thought it might be possible. But if there's constant work in front of you, then that concept might never escape the world of idealism. It's one of those things you'd like to think of, but never fully execute. I know I always say "I gotta grind, I gotta hustle" and all that shit, but I realized that half the time I'm half-assing. Only a few times this school year have I truly felt I put everything I got into a piece of work. I feel that I've slacked off little by little, and now it has started to roll down the hill pessimism into one giant hollow snowball. I guess the best I can do now is strategize the five weeks I have left and see what I can do to keep my GPA.

Two A's, and two B's. Yeah, that might work out.



So help me, God,
Ricardo Juni

Summer, what the fuck? Get over here already!

Ok, so another month has passed since I last blogged. So whoop there it is! Here's another monthly essay of shit!

I can't wait for the summer already! I just finished my fifth week of Spring Quarter at De Anza and it has gone by so quick. I have to say, this quarter is my hardest one yet. I'm taking a Physical Anthropology class which is pretty interesting. My teacher is straight up African and look like a cross between Mr. Schuler and Dave Chappelle haha. He's already one of my favorite teachers! I'm also taking Physical Geography which is half the time interesting. It's weird though because it seems we learn a lot about meteorology. I also have an art class that's on Tues./Thurs. for 2 hours and 40 minutes, but he usually lets us out 25 minutes early. That class is hella fun and easily forreal! And I'm also taking an English writing class that is basically another fuckin' physical anthropology class since our discussion is based around Darwin's books on the theory of evolution. The class is cool, but I have a drill seargent for a professor :[ I swear, he has the craziest MANtrums.

Por ejemplo: the class wasn't really discussing the assigned reading so he gave us a pop quiz. Some of us, including myself, didn't read so he just took our blank sheets of paper and basically went off saying shit like, "Are you too fucking busy to do your homework or something?" blah blah blah. So he was pretty much pissed. The ones who didn't read had to stay and read as much of the Descent of Man until he let us out. When he finally did, he was saying shit like, "I know you guys are busy with other things, but you gotta find a way to finish the readings because it'll greatly help you with your midterm papers" blah blah blah. I was like WHOA, did this nigga just turned on us?! He's like the second coming of Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde! But besides his uncontrollable bitching, he's a cool teacher who knows his shit. You can tell that this jiggaboo is hella smart.

OK, enough about school. Let me get back to how excited I am for summer '09! I have a feeling that this summer is going to be out of fuckin' control! I could already see it: concerts at Shoreline and Arco (The Fray, Beyonce, No Doubt please!), bbqs in the hood with lawn chairs of all sorts, bowling 'til the AM without getting in trouble for once tehehe, breakfast ;), OH SHAWWWING to the max! haha, sleeping in, open gym volleyball everywhere nigga!, making THEE videos, chill sessions, hookah, Grey Goose haha, Fowler, deep conversations, all-nighters with the downass bitches, hopefully an LA trip!, summer blockbusters, more financial aid money! hahah, riding around with the longboarders on my BEACH CRUISER hollleration!, my siblings' birthdays, kites!, TARGETTTT, BEAAACHHES with the bitches, mall hopping when the weather starts to fuckin' frizz the weave, ETC AND ETC. I live for the summmmaaaaaa time in the SJCC DAWGZ.

In other news, I'm going to MP's prom with my FOB SISTAH SELLYSELL! How fun is that shit gonna be?! I need some cash for my blazer and shoes though yikes! But it'll work out itself :]

I'm gonna ref with CRAZYASSS BITCH CHRISTLE BALTAZAR at Battle of the Tribes yeee! That's gonna be HELLLA FUN too! I just hope we don't ref Evergreen's team eeeeeek :[ that'll be alll booootsie!

ummmmz, I think that's it for now. But prom and BOTT hella remind me that summer is just around the corner. And I'm going to welcome it with open arms.

impatiently waiting,
Ricardo Juni

WHOA! It's been exactly a month since the last time I blogged! And let me tell you world, thangs have been poppin'!

Let's start with Winter Quarter at De Anza. I have to say that Fall Quarter was better! But the recent has been memorable. I've made friends that I hope to see around campus. Hopefully, I get one B and two A's. Finals were not as crazy. But Humanities was fuckin' bananas! It was an interview project with someone of a different religious background. My partner was a girl named Michelle. Damn, it's like Michelles gravitate towards me! But anyway, she's a Druid. For dumbasses who don't know what that is, it's type of Contemporary Paganism which concentrates on nature-based beliefs. It was so fascinating to go in-depth to her religion and herself too. She told me that they pray to more than 30 gods! daaaaamn. She grew up in a region of the dirtyyy South that was 99% Christian (and narrow-minded and stubborn at that!), while she herself was beginning to practice Druidry. Just imagine how intense things were! They use to throw shit at her, and ridicule and criticize her beliefs. How fucked up right?! Some even called her a Satan worshipper! But enough about her... The final came to be 32 1/2 pages long, though part of which was her interview responses tehehe. For Philosophy, we just had a 50 true/false and multiple choice test along with an essay (short answer) section. I wish I studied more and that I took this class more seriously. But damn, it was a joke! And for Cultural Anthropology, we also just had a 50 multiple choice test which seemed pretty easy, though I wish I studied more too. But what can you do.

I'm on Spring Break right now and it's been going fuckin' SWELL.
Thursday: There was a little picnic sorta of get together at Fowler Park. Nothing really formal or really planned out well. It was suppose to be a potluck, but ended up being more like a "soiree" type of deal that we went through in high school. The usual junk food was present: chips. OH! And KFC was added as a little twist. Plus there wasn't any drinks. Whatever dawgz. Then Target was next on the agenda for some sandals and a sickening fedora I got for the beach the next day. Later in the evening we went bowling and we all fucked up haha. We waited for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. I died numerous times inside and no one seemed to notice :[ *Hair Flip.

Friday: BEACH! A good amount of people came and we just played football, chilled and gossiped, played in teh sad, threw the frisbee around, and collected hermit crabs that we ended up throwing back into the ocean. WTF I wanted to fry them and serve them with some chicken fried rice. But Buddha wasn't on my side that day tsk tsk. We got home around 6:30 and me, Jacky, Anthony, Mish, Daniel, and Andre had to get ready for Kat's dinner, which I still am baffled on the fact that she actually invited me. YIPES! It was pleasant. The food was good but we had to wait TWO HOURS for our table! Kat and Jacky's church friends came and showed us these weird, retarded mental games that didn't make any sense to anyone at the table. I guess people that are into nerdy incebreakers piss World of Warcraft characters over that shit. After that, ME, Anthony, Mish, and Jacky went back to my house and just chilled until 2am.

Saturday: Since it was Mish's last night at home, we decided to have a little get together at Josh's. But before that, me, her, and Jacky went to Target and Walmart to peruse through the toy sections to find Kat's belated birthday gift from Jacky. Mission incompleted. Where the fuck can we buy Rob Dyrdek toys?! I got A Thousand Splendid Suns for free dollars :]]] We finally found ourselves at Josh's and we chilled, played cards, and drank up. Saturday was spelled V-O-D-K-A. It was the star of the night. We got better at our fob accents and made an inside joke, Jeninaaaa haha. We left around 5am. When I got home, I showered and read the first twenty pages of my soon-to-be favorite book after The Kite Runner, its predecessor.

Sunday: Happy Birthday Adrian! We had a casual dinner at fuckin' Chili's and was pretty chill, except for the fact that hella people flaked. At least he knows who his downass bitches are. Holleration. Then we headed to Josh's house haha and just played cards and talked to ghosts. ooohhh spoooky *farts.

Monday: I think I just stayed home all day and ate. It felt like my entire 6th grade year.

Tuesday: BEACH AGAIN! Did the same thang as Friday. Me and Dexter made this sickening sea serpent Chinese dragon sort of monster. Passerbys kept stopping and looking at it, which made me feel good tehehe. I HATE driving to/from Santa Cruz! Too many damn curves and tailgaters. It felt like peer pressure. Then we went to mine and Anthony's houses and had a bbq, which I believe to be one of the best we've ever had! There were Mi Pueblo chicken fajitas, salsa, sriracha HAWT sauce, and fresh flour tortillas, all in honor of Cesar Chavez. You go boy! Work! haha.

Though I've done hella stuff during my week off, I still want to do MORE MORE MORE. Like: a trip to San Francisco, Target shopping ;], apply for Zumiez, one more beach trip, bowling, hookah, homies bbq, frozen yogurt, and to finish A Thousand Splendid Suns! I love that book already. I've read a little over a quarter of the novel in a matter of three days. I want to finish that and another book by the end of my break.

Let it be known: Spring Break '09 will rule all others before it.

with much confidence and vigor,
Ricardo Juni

Today was my birthday.
I turned 19.
It was fabulous.
I'm fabulous.
It started off fabulous, and ended even more fabulous.
I woke up around 12.
Got ready for my cousin, Roman's, 2nd birthday!
It was soooooooo cooool!
It was a petting zoo themed party at Manong Marcus' house.
There were goats, bunnies, hens, guinea pigs, and a PONY!
There was sooo much food too! I loved it!
After, me and Scott left a little early to get Michelle's stuff at Great Mall.
We stopped by Dollar Tree too!
I swear, it's my new favorite store! :]
Then we came home and I finished a few things.
After, I met up with Michelle and Mikee at her house.
We got the goodies ready, Mikee left to get our reservations, and Santi finally came.
We then drove to Sonoma Chicken Coop and awaited for the rest of my posse.
Everyone came and we enjoyed each others' company.
The food was great, the people were lively, but the tent was like an oven.
Besides that, everything was absolutely dandy.
We chit chatted, ate, laughed, joked around, went crazy, etc.
Then it was time for dessert! Tiramisu hoolllllaa!
Then Michelle and I opened our presents! I loved them too!
We all parted, but some of us met at Josh's for a little after party :]
We drank up, had even MORE laughs, talked about high school and college, celebrity gossip!, and everything else in between.
OH! And me and Jan taught Anthony how to ride a bike drunk! haha.
Around 3:30am me and Anthony went home.
I had to walk his ass to his room, but I didn't mind at all.
Now I'm here a little tipsy but nonetheless stable enough to shower, write this blog, and not have Mr. Dad smell any alcohol.
Today was a fabulous day.

This birthday was definitely better than last year's. I do wish that some people came on time, and others actually make it at all. But hopefully their intentions for either being late or missing were in the right place.. I don't get down with the bullshit.

So one thing that lingered in my mind the whole night was how even though I'm a year older, I don't feel any older. I still feel like the same person - the same person I have been for quite a while now. Age is nothing but a number, not a state of mind. As long as your heart's pumping blood, you shouldn't feel like you can crash any moment. That's one thing that people forget as they age.

OH And I might go see Britney Spears in concert. YES be jealous!

With much love from the newly 19 year-old,
Ricardo Juni

14 more days...

I come from purity. But wait, didn't we all? Didn't we all start from something truly clean and contained? We all came into this world crying, as if a divination told us of our future dilemmas, both conscious and unconscious. But along the way, we were tainted with stupidity. Covered in naivety, drenched in ourselves, and smashed up into a sinful paste used for an unfortunate portrait. In our paths to finding ourselves, we epiphanized how insignificant matters of utter trivial pettiness really were. We then attempted to undo this radical shift of self-awareness we burdened ourselves with through repentance, love, and good karma. Needless to say it wasn't so much as a stroll in the park though; it took the saltiest of sweat to achieve greatness. Now we're better and surpassing our own expectations. Sure we've stumbled, but it ironically helped construct the next step on our golden staircase. We will soon see the light.

Settle the indifferences and return to the stage of humanity. Let the earth enjoy its time without any interruptions. It's finally time to give It the peace and serenity it deserves. Enlighten yourself.

22 more days...

This might sound a little dramatic but I'm so tired of my life right now. Everyday, it's the same exact monotonous routine: school, home, eat, and sleep. There isn't a highlight to my day. Well maybe American Idol on Tuesdays and Wednesdays and ABDC3 on Thursdays, but it's nothing to go ape-shit over. I need more spice, sudden fireworks to my overly gray skies, if you will. Certainly a quick roller coaster of emotions and events will do the trick. But what are the options? I can't just plan things because it isn't as fun as spontaneity, that's for sure.

In other news, my birthday is in a few weeks and I can't wait. But I can't believe I'll be nineteen already. Just yesterday I was taking my behind the wheel exam. The other day I was playing DDR with Jessica and Scotty in my garage. I'm a child in a pseudo-mature world. But with age comes experience and with this experience comes memories. And I can't wait to make more during my nineteenth year here.

Also, I've been drawing much more lately. I don't know why but listening to music really plucks the artistic strings in my brain. I'd be listening to The Fray or Alicia Keys and imagine what the music would look like if it was turned into a garment. And since they have really soulful ballads, the sketches look very romantic, flowy, and somewhat ethereal. And I've also been thinking up of eccentric themes for a runway show, like if a tribal elder met a medieval knight; a cross between nature and structure, or if a traditional Tahitian dancer wore a Salvador Dali painting; feelings of grace and intensity within a disoriented dream. So once I get my printer to work again, I'll scan some and lay them out here. I know I said I'd show my sketches a while back, but I lost them! :[ So i've been drawing and drawing like a dog with rabies. Just pray that I can get my printer to function!

OH, and fuck Etta James for calling Beyonce out and for being a dumbass hypocrite.

with much fabulosity,
Ricardo Juni

27 more days...

Let me start by saying that The Fray's self-named album is coming out tomorrow! After a good three years, FINALLY. AAAND the entire album can be heard on Vh1.com so I'm basically shitting fireballs because it's pretty crispy. I'm on the fence on whether or not it's has good as How to Save A Life though; I just have to constantly listen to the songs like I did with their first one. But, anything The Fray produces is an A+ in my book.

I know one thing is for damn sure: the lyrics are just as soulful and poignant than ever! That's the number one reason why The Fray is my favorite band. The lyrics provoke the human experience and question traditional and orthodox beliefs. I know they're devoted Christians and all, but thanks be to God himself upstairs that no one has ever considered them being a CHRISTIAN ROCK band. I'd just die and go to heaven and play poker with Jesus if that were to ever float onto the public pond. But SINCE they're devoted, some songs can have the perception that they were written because of post-religious events. But whatever the inspiration, I'm glad that they can continue writing provoking lyrics.

"Where were You when everything was falling apart
All my days were spent by a telephone
That never rang and all I needed was a call
That never came to the corner of First and Amistad"
-You Found Me

"Happiness damn near destroys you
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor
So you tell yourself that’s enough for now
But happiness has a violent roar"
-Happiness

"It all began with a man & country
Every plan turns another century
Around again, another nation fallen
Maybe God can be on both sides
Of the gun, never understood why
Some of us never get it so good, so good
Some of this was here before us
All of this will go after us
It never stops until we give in, give in"
-Say When

OH and I pre-ordered their DELUXE EDITION hollleration! haha. So i'm excited for that especially. And they're going to be on Good Morning America on Tuesday morning too, so hopefully I can watch them before I go to school. And they're holding a livestream concert online on Wednesday night, so I probably won't go to volleyball since there isn't a concert in California. How stupid right?! But anyway, I sound like a fuckin' straight-up stalker, but believe me when I say that there are worst :] hehe.

Damn, I love The Fray.

LOVE,
Ricardo

RECAP(itulation)

Let's see. It has roughly been a month since my last post and I would say a good amount of things have changed. The drama went away, Winter Quarter started, and bowling pretty much on the daily.

The weeks have gone by so fast. It's about to be the FIFTH week of the quarter and I must say, it's been a breeze so far.
Humanities 9 is pretty interesting. My instructor, Dr. White, has an obvious passion for what she teaches and it's absorbed well by most of the students in the class. The work is really easy and the people are nice and respectful. I look forward to this class everyday, even though I don't speak out enough.
Philosophy 1 is fuckin' hell. The class is soooooo boring, I died a few times. On the first day, someone actually fell asleep! Well, more like WENT to sleep intentionally. Mr. Burke is a cool old guy, but he needs to find a better way to make his lectures more engaging.
Anthropology 2 is interesting as well. I guess I'm one of a few that do since I want to minor in the subject. Mrs. Yang's stories always have to do either with those damn Koreans or that fuckin' Mapuche tribe.
De Anza continues to amaze me because of the fact that there are soooo many types of people. My humanities class alone, which focuses on comparative religions, brings together people from a variety of religious and cultural backgrounds. We got the Catholics, the Athiests, the Agnostics, the Buddhists, the Existentialists, the Muslims... fuck, we even got a DRUID up in the mix! I've also come across people who seriously seem to just not a give a fuck about school, ex. the guy that went to sleep on the first day of Philosophy 1, even though they're paying for it? stupid. OH and this one chick who went to Westmont doesn't know anything about East Side schools. That chickenhead did not know where MP, Piedmont Hills, and EV were! Whaaaat!
But anyway, I've made a few new friends as well so I'm happy.

Besides school and home, the only other thing I do weekly is bowl. I've been bowling with Anthony, Daniel and other bitches too much. In the past week, we went three times! Oh Christ, there goes my wallet! We've been bowling so much, but at least everyone has been getting consistent and achieving personal bests, sooo YEE! BUTTT I haven't :[ haha. Whatever, ain't no thang.

So this blog wasn't as insightful, oh well? Sometimes, I just need to write down stuff for future reference.

for your information,
Ricardo Juni

UGH the D R A M A

So it's only been less than three days into the new year and there has been so much drama that even Gretchen Weiners can't hold it all in her weave! I swear. "Using" people. Pushovers. Passive children. Shady-ness. Awkwardness between people who once had a beautiful relationship. Is it that hard to just be down for whatever? Or to just speak your fuckin' mind and quit beating around the bush about everything? Or to just have a spine and not let people trample all over you? Or to just talk it out even though it may be awkward?

Saying "no" isn't always a bad thing. But on the other side of the fence, there are those who sort of failed to carry good intentions. But don't be trampled on with them. Keep a strong stance and you'll get your way as long as you're polite. Don't let drugs and drinks get in the way... too much.

If the entire world held a passive tongue, then nothing would ever get done. Sometimes it really does come down to saying a simple "yes" or "no." Don't make things difficult by saying "maybe" or nothing at all! A firm answer will help the world move forward. If you're not down, then say so and boogie off and not waste my time.

I understand that friends don't always have to know what the other is doing. But if it's something really simple to grasp, then why not tell them? If there's a serious problem in one's personal life outside friendships, of course handle yo' thang boo. Just give a little tidbit and they'll back off. But if it's something so small as to what you're going to do after, then just tell us instead of us having to question each others' trust.

Friendships can be tricky, and some fade away into the horizon. But we can all avoid those hazards by just talking things out. If both sides are cooperative, then the bond can grow stronger. But if the seesaw leans a little to one side, then there's a problem; it has to be addressed right away. But maybe sometimes one side doesn't try as hard. Or maybe they actualy don't realize the problem. In the first case: If one has tried to get together while the other hasn't, then maybe it is best to just drop it. And for the second case: Start off by having a one-on-one sort of session and play it by ear. Friendships can disappear, but make sure your friends don't become your frenemies. At least stay neutral.

It's 2009. We're all about to be nineteen years-old. Why can't we face our real problems and realize our own downfalls, instead of living in an episode of Gossip Girl.

With much concern,
Ricardo Juni